Christian Love for Dummies

That would be my personal title for Thich Nhat Hanh's book, "Teachings on Love."

Jesus, everyone knows, would have us love one another.  Is it just me, or is this way harder than it seems like it should be?  Despite my best efforts, I so often have found myself in relationship disasters, or thinking thoughts that could hardly be called "loving."  I knew I was failing in this basic commandment, but didn't know how to do better.

Into this confusion and disappointment came Vietnamese Buddhist teacher Thich Nhat Hanh, known to his students, among which I am honored to find myself, as "Thay", pronounced "tie", which means "teacher."  ( And which is easier to type or say than the whole name.)

Jesus tells you to love, along with a lot of confusing parables and symbolic statements.  ("I am the Bread of Life"?  What on earth does that mean?)  Thay tells you how to do it.  Seriously, he makes it a step-by-step process. 

Following difficult commandments and unraveling esoteric stories confuses me and makes me nervous.  Step-by-step instructions--this I can do. To learn to be loving, says Thay, you have to meditate to create the energy of love within you.  First, that love must be directed to yourself.  Then, when you are able to create the energy of love and peace within you, "just a little", says Thay, encouragingly, you can begin to extend that energy out to others.

It's not easy, it takes daily, hourly, constant work, and those unloving meanies will pop up and try to get you.  But it works.

And here's the great thing--learning to meditate according to Thay's directions, which is very close to Christian contemplative prayer, actually helps me understand much more deeply the teachings of Jesus.  "Bread of life" starts to make a certain energetic, poetic sense. 

So, who would have thought that a Buddhist teacher could help deepen my Christianity, and could teach me the complexities and difficulties and varieties of love?  Surprises abound.  Love is like music, or sailing, or prayer--there is always something new to learn.  I will always make mistakes.  But in Thay's "love meditations", I will always have the means to figure them out, correct them, and get on course again with Jesus' great commandment:  Love one another.